Open Letter to Morally Bankrupt Thieves

I had a whole other post drafted, but after the spectacular events of last night I think this takes precidence.  

To the assholes that stole my bag last night with everything in it:

Thank you for gifting me hours of frustrating and elaborate phone trees to cancel all my credit cards from Spain.

Thank you for the totally disheartening phone call to the consulate at 3am that informed me that there's absolutely nothing they could do about my stolen passport until Monday because of a very conveniently placed national holiday.

Thank you for taking my beloved camera that I've had for almost ten years.

Thank you for taking my first ever pair of prescription sunglasses.

Thank you for taking my journal, complete with train tickets, recipes, all my private thoughts, and photos of friends.

Thank you for taking my Tilley Bag, a birthday gift from my father.

Thank you for taking my giving key, a very special gift I have been carrying around for over a year with it scarcely leaving my side.  The ironic part?  It said "faith."

Thank you for giving me the pleasure of spending my Christmas evening in a police station in a country where I don't speak the language (where, of course, the English translator had gone home for the day).

But you know what?

Yesterday I also saw the opposite side of that coin.

Yesterday people I've known for three days, one day, and only a few hours paid for my dinner, came with me to the police station, got indignant on my behalf with everyone from the restaurant owners for not paying attention to themselves for not following their "spidey sense" about the couple seated behind us, handed me tissues when I cried, translated English to Spanish and back again, helped me brainstorm everything I had lost, laughed with me about the absurdity of it all, proofread police reports, helped identify one of the theiving bastards from a mug shot, walked me home, got me the number for the consulate, and promised they would take care of me as long as I needed help.

Yesterday I was first given the strength to laugh when on the phone with a young lady with Chase Visa when, upon hearing the police wouldn't file a report until I canceled all my credit cards, stated incredulously, "now that is the stupidest thing I've ever heard."

Yesterday I met a policeman who smiled apologetically and said, "welcome to Barcelona."  And I laughed again.

Yesterday I met two other people who had also been robbed the same night, and we instantly formed a bond of mutual support and held each other up.

Yesterday I was reminded that these are only things; they are all replaceable.  Two people with no moral high ground stand no chance against the abundance of true human kindness.  

And, I have a bed to sleep in, clothes, an iPad, two oranges, and a bottle of water, and you know the best part?

This morning they found my passport and my (empty, as expected) wallet.  Now I have photo ID.  And after everything, that might be the best Christmas present ever, because all things are possible with government issued identification.  (As it turns out, when a bag containing a passport is stolen the morally bankrupt responsible parties ditch it immediately about 85% of the time because in Spain the repercussions of carrying someone else's stolen ID are not even close to worth the risk of pawning it.)

That all being said:

I hope those hunky Policia find your sorry asses and that you kindly rot in hell.

Love, Swan